PUG Communications Mental Illnesses Running in The Family Discussion
ANSWER
Response to Post #1 – Jeremy Harvey
I think your revised paragraph effectively incorporates the research information to support your point about the resurgence of deadly diseases due to anti-vaccination sentiments. The information from Michelle M. Papachrisanthou’s academic journal strengthens your argument by providing reasons behind vaccine hesitancy and its impact on disease resurgence. The flow of the paragraph seems appropriate, and the balance between your original content and the research information is well maintained. The paragraph effectively highlights the increase in diseases like measles and mumps due to the anti-vaccine movement. Your open-ended question about the paragraph’s flow and focus is valid, as striking the right balance between your own ideas and external sources can be challenging.
Question for Classmates: How do you ensure that the incorporation of research information into a paragraph maintains a smooth flow and effectively supports your main argument?
Response to Post #2 – Michael Cookson
Your draft paragraph is well-structured and discusses the historical context of technological advancements in education. The addition of information about internet usage among low-income families would certainly enhance your point about the evolving accessibility of technology. The link you’ve provided seems relevant and insightful. However, when incorporating the information about the growth of inter-connectivity and under-connectivity in low-income areas, be sure to smoothly integrate this information into the paragraph to maintain the overall flow. Maybe consider using a transition sentence to lead into this new information.
QUESTION
Description
Reliable and Relevant Sources
Prepare: Complete the Unit 7 Reading and Activities sections.
Post: Make your initial post to the Discussion Board.
Locate one claim or point that needs to be strengthened within one body paragraph of your Unit 6 Assignment. Then find one reliable and relevant source that will support it. Include the URL link to the source in your post so your classmates can review the source.
Then, explain why this source is reliable and relevant to your paper.
Select a body paragraph from your Unit 6 Assignment that needs research information to support, develop, or clarify ideas effectively. Then, paraphrase and incorporate the relevant source from the source you selected into that paragraph to help clarify, develop, or explain your point or claim in that paragraph. Post both the original paragraph from your Unit 6 Assignmentand the revised paragraph that now includes research information. Do not worry about citing the source correctly — you will learn to do that in Unit 8. Instead, use a signal phrase inside the paragraph (like “According to Smith…”) to introduce the source information within the paragraph.
Include an open-ended question about any issue your initial post raises which your classmates can help you with.
Respond: Respond to at least two classmates’ initial Discussion Board posts. Be sure to briefly review their source and comment on the reliability and relevance of the source your classmate has chosen. Offer suggestions for how your classmate might more effectively paraphrase and incorporate the source into the revised paragraph. Make suggestions for other, more reliable sources that could be used or more relevant information that needs to be included in the paragraph to support the classmate’s main point or claim. Remember, effective teamwork this week can help you and your classmates ensure you have reliable sources and are ready to hit the ground running and begin integrating paraphrased research into your draft.
READING AND RESOURCES
The Unit 7 Reading will help you define the difference between reliable and unreliable sources, identify source information relevant to the specific point you are making in your writing, and help you to build your ability to paraphrase and integrate source information into your own writing skillfully and effectively. You will then need to apply this information to your Discussion Board response this week and in your upcoming Unit 8 Assignment. Locating reliable research is also a skill which you are likely to use in your future career field as you research and learn about issues and topics in your field.
Post #1
Jeremy Harvey
Hello Everyone, Here is my original paragraph followed by the revised one with research. I chose to do the one about the resurgence of deadly diseases. I decided it would be easier to focus on fewer diseases so I can go more in depth and not bore the reader with all the different ones, let me know what you think.
Original:
Diseases have been around since the start of microorganisms and through anti-vaccination the resurgence of deadly disease has become more prevalent. More and more people are not vaccinating because of fear of harm from the chemical makeup of vaccines. Vaccines have been essential to the health of the population protecting against the flu, measles, meningitis, polio, pertussis and tetanus to name a few. Since the start of the Anti-vaccine movement there has been an alarming increase in measles, mumps and pertussis all of which are preventable through vaccination; very deadly diseases like meningitis have become more common as children aren’t receiving the meningitis B-vaccine.
Revised:
Diseases have been around since the start of microorganisms and through anti-vaccination has come the resurgence of deadly vaccine preventable diseases. According to an academic journal by Michelle M. Papachrisanthou DNP, CPN-PC more people today are becoming vaccine hesitant for fear that vaccines do not work, cause immune system overload, and their suggested links to autism. Vaccines have been essential to the health of the population protecting against the flu, measles, mumps, meningitis, and pertussis to name a few. Since the start of the anti-vaccine movement there has been an alarming return of diseases once thought eradicated. One of which is the recent measles outbreak in Minnesota in 2017 where 65 people from infants to elderly were infected with the virus 95 percent of which were unvaccinated. Another is the mumps outbreaks in 2016-2017 rising from almost none in the 1990’s to a skyrocketed number of over 1.1 million people in the world infected and upwards of 12,000 cases here in the US alone.
Do you feel as if this paragraph flows for focuses too much on the articles information? It is hard to tell for me with a topic that requires a lot of support.
Post #2
Michael Cookson
The link above leads to a research publication that’s rather extensive, but offers insight into technology and internet usage among low-income families. The topic of my paper was on innovation in Human Services using technology. In one of the paragraphs that I used to claim that internet usage among low income families is growing, I could use the information in this article as a helpful support. Even since this data was published in 2016, the usage of technology has increased rapidly.
Here’s the drafted paragraph:hfghfghfghfgfghfgfghfgh
Looking back through history, technology has always provided an advancement of efficiency, this is no question. Within society as a whole, we rely on technology to some extent every day. For example, in the early 1920’s the first radio broadcast of educational content was conducted. Then, in just six, short years, the Distance Education and Training Council was founded. From there, short and long distant communication were utilized and innovated upon repeatedly in order to provide education to a broader range of people. This might seem trivial now, but this was a huge leap in the sharing of information. We sometimes value our information very flippantly, because it is so accessible. However, there are populations all across the world still that do not have the same access, and it was the same environment in the 1920’s which inspired others to innovate communication and education.
At the end of this paragraph I could add how inter-connectivity has grown tremendously since the 1920’s, but still in low income areas most families are “under-connected”, which basically just means they don’t use broadband internet, and instead rely mostly on their cell service. This might tie into one of the last paragraphs of my paper that references a mobile app designed to aid with a social service.
Let me know what you guys think.